Monday Musings

Dear Universe,

It's Monday, which always finds me struggling to face the realities of life. The realities that take me outside my home and the mindset I'm so comfortable in. The realities that force me to go to a job I am really beginning to despise. I'm still looking for something more appropriate, but it's slim pickings out there.

The sun is shining and it is supposed to warm up to the mid 60's today. I'm hoping that helps my mood improve. I felt it starting yesterday, the Sunday spiral that always hits me at the end of the weekend. I did my best to not let it overwhelm me and had some small success.

Of course, it would have been easier had Musicman decided to take advantage of the empty house for some play time, but he didn't. The fact that we had plenty of playtime over the last several days had something to do with that. I just always seem to want more than he does.

I'm trying very hard to embrace the positive and not let myself become overwhelmed, but that's not easy for me. My hip has been bothering me since yesterday morning. Musicman has a habit of using me to push himself up and out of bed. I've never cared for that habit, but I never say anything unless he unwittingly hurts me. Yesterday, he hurt me. He planted his hand right on my bad hip and then pushed all his body weight on it, ouch. I heard and felt the crunching in the joint and I'm still feeling the pain today.

I know he did not mean to hurt me, he would never willingly hurt me, but it hurts. It also makes me worry about how much longer it will be before I can no longer go on ignoring the fact that I have something major going on in that hip. Needless to say, I'm not looking forward to 6 hours of sitting at my desk today.

We heard on the news last night that a young co-worker of Musicman's was injured in an accident last night. That and the pain I'm dealing with just serve to point out to me that we all have a finite time here and we need to make the most of it. I don't feel like I am making the most of it right now because I am not following my passion, work takes up too much of my time and I struggle not to resent that.

Give me the strength to get through this week at work without major stress. I continue to leave myself open to all opportunities and sincerely hope I find a way to meet my obligations without resenting the drain on my time.

Love,
Lolita Lilyflower