Stormy Weather

Dear Universe,

We had a good weekend, low key doing errands and just spending time together. Mr. was feeling good, I was feeling good and everything was lovely.

Unforunately that only lasted for the weekend. Yesterday I started spiralling early, I fought it all day long. It had been such a good weekend, there was no reason for the spiralling. I did wonder several times throughout the day how Mr. was doing. When he struggles I struggle, that's just the way it is.

As soon as he walked in the door I had my answer. He had been struggling all day with fatigue and I think depression. The doctors told us that he may experience depression, he had not been having a problem with it, but I think his frustration level has gotten so high that he is now struggling with it a little bit.

He continues to have this up and down cycle with his energy levels. At  3 1/2 months post surgery that's probably not too unusual. It still frustrates him though. We continue to search for an answer to this cyclical illness he has been experiencing. The test we had done last week was negative, that's both good and bad.

It's good because he won't have to have another procedure. It's bad because we still don't know what's causing it and therefore we can't stop it. I still think it may be a medication issue even if the doctors don't agree. He has an appt in a few weeks for a check up and I'm hoping he will have an in depth conversation with the doctor about it. Maybe then they will consider changing the med in question.

He has a procedure coming up this Thursday that should be simple and routine. For so many reasons there will most likely be nothing either simple or routine about it. But, since I believe forwarned is forearmed I'm trying to be well prepared for any eventuality. I'd rather be prepared for something that doesn't happen then not be prepared for something that does.